Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize