my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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