Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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