im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
