Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?

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(714): View more from California

thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(419): View more from Ohio

I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?

(937): View more from Ohio

Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.

(419): View more from Ohio

Is that considered a cock block?

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Lube is flammable

(404): View more from Georgia

Who is this??

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(503): View more from Oregon

Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.

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(509): View more from Washington

You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.

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