I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
