READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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