Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
