she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
