East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
