what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
