1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
More tranny stories later!
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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