Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
