My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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