I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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