the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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