Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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