cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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