I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
So drunk its hurt
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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