her vagine was all disorganized.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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