Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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