Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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