Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
