You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Every concussion has its silver lining
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
