I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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