Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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