we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Randomize
