She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
