we're blogging at a bar
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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