it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Sober January is a disaster.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016