i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
