Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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