Sorry, I don't speak sober.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
