we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
