I'm drive I can fine osifer
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
