I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
