nut hugger
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
