I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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