Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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