I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I have demons in me.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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