Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
