You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
