My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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