Whoa Z and x make the same sound
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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