I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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