I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
