are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
