My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.