where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize