why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
